Meet The Face Behind Motivately

Hello, Wah Gwan! 

My name is Rory and I am an avid/wild dreamer who loves to formulate ideas and creative concepts that makes you think and inspires you to do and live your best life un-apologetically. 

My Journey

This is my journey: To rebel against fear, depression, sickness and other squatters (anything in your life that comes to steal, kill and destroy) and to live my best life. To be myself un-apologetically and in-turn inspire others to do the same. I have a special place in my heart for misfits and those at rock bottom. Those who feel counted out and forgotten, those who feel lost in the sea of life. I am you. 
 
I migrated from Jamaica as a troubled teenager(16) and lived in Harlem New York with my father and his wife; both I met for the first time. It was a rocky stay, but I took it as a second chance and applied myself well in high school(Wadleigh Secondary School). However, I was kicked out their house after two years. I didn't have a place to live, so I packed my clothes in garbage bags and I took the MTA bus to my moms small little room in midtown Manhattan. She was a live in nanny, and I was afforded a 2 month emergency stay with her, with only $75 to my name. Right before I completed my move, (my stepmother's, son), handed me a letter, and it read, "congratulations, you've been accepted to Delaware State University"!
I wasn't into church at that time, but I did pray to God for the key to college and I did feel like I had a relationship with him. Atleast, I felt things would work out, someway, somehow and they did. So, I was able to leave straight from my moms little room to board in college. I was at Delaware State for two years(majoring in Chemistry), and focus was a struggle, but I was able to get an internship and make some money to help myself. My mom gave everything she had to help me with tuition the first year too. That $75 I had, I gave away to a non-profit cause in Israel right before I moved to Delaware. I knew God saw that as faith and gave me favor to get additional aid to supplement my tuition costs.

The Pacific Ocean (lost at sea).

There's a true story of a fisherman (Salvador Alvarenga), who survived being lost at sea for 438 days. Against all odds he survived this nightmarish experience. This was truly miraculous, especially when you take into consideration that the pacific ocean covers 1/3 of the earth's whole surface. It's not somewhere you want to get lost. Salvador along with another man, left off a coast in Mexico called "Costa Azul" on a small fishing boat. They only planned to do a 30 hour fishing shift to make ends meet. Unfortunately, they got caught in a storm and had to throw everything off board. They were about 6 hours from the coast, so they desperately traveled through the night to get back to shore. By morning, they were only 15 miles away from coast and could see mountains from the horizon. But awful luck struck them and their motor died. An unusually strong wind began to push their boat back out towards the ocean. Their on board radio still worked however, so they frantically reported their position to their boss, who said he was coming, but their battery died. Imagine the frustration that they must have both felt as their radio died, along with all contact with the outside world with it? And as they watched the mountains in the horizon that they were so close to slowly disappear as their boat drifted back out into the vast abyss. 

I shared this story because, life can be like this sometimes. This is how I felt. I wanted to make life better for myself and my family like anyone else. I did everything the world said to do(go to college to get a good career or job etc). But after the second year, a storm came. I became mysteriously ill and had to leave school( A vacation to Jamaica didn't help). This wasn't work stress.  I started to experience a heavy cloud of depression; something foreign to me, because I was always an optimistic person. Anyway, I went back to New York and had to stay with my mother again. During this time I seeked medical help. I traveled from doctor to doctor. I even visited church after to church to see if anyone could help me or pray for me(I didn't find any relief). I decided to read the bible myself and ended up reading a scripture I didn't understand and it sent me spiraling into greater depression. This shook the only strength I had; my hope in God's love for me. I never completely let go of faith, but I struggled from that moment.

It was recommended that i take anti-depressants(I tried it with caution), but ended up in the ER because my body began to shake violently and I was simultaneously feeling something like electricity on the left side of my head. I began experiencing a whole host of new issues from that moment on. To continue getting treatment, i decided to be a inpatient. Meaning I had to stay in a hospital(Bellevue Hospital) to be observed while drugs were administered to me. I was too fearful to take drugs by myself. This stay lasted 3 weeks. 

 

Since 2006, I have battled. I should have given up many times. I tried to do college again, passing all the placement exams. In my chemistry class, I realized I couldn't see the board, and spent a few weeks to get my glasses. Missing vital information. I became overly anxious and hid in the stair cases during classes and during lunch. It got so bad, that I withdrew from school. They are so many more details, that it all couldn't hold here. So I  will wrap this up.  Eventually, I found a performing arts church called the Rock Churches, where I met two pastors who were identical twins(Bruce and Glen). They helped me to get out the house(I was locked in for years). I worked and did community service projects to help my recovery until i couldn't take it any more and socializing became a complicated thing for me, so I was mostly alone and depressed at home. With God's help and using these amazing men, I have been gradually improving. It's still a journey, but I am not where i used to be and my future is bright. So if you are on your own journey, lets walk together. You're not alone. lets kick some ass!

Music was one of the gifts I discovered I had while attending the Rock. And it has been one of the best therapies for me and others who hear it. Here is one of my first songs I have every written, called Rebels. It's a song where I/we rebel against everything that has kept us down and blinded to the greatness within us. I don't always feel perfect, but as long as I keep fighting and don't give up, I'll be a rebel for life. 

 

 

The Chorus sings,

"We are rebels, against darkness. Joy, against sadness. Peace, when everything is madness. Forgiveness when this world is heartless."

You know, this is always my pursuit; the mindset and lifestyle I seek.. peace, joy, love etc... especially when you've been through so many trying things. Motivately, is the result of my struggles. It's a part of my testimony. To overcome and inspire others to do the same.

 

 

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Bless Up,

Rory